INDIANA – As a parent, I tried to raise my children with specific core values and principles that are important to our family, hoping they would model these values when I was not around. This did not come about quickly, and I had to ask myself some difficult questions. “How do I want others to see my children?” I wanted people to consider my kids kind, honest, and respectful. “What will motivate my children to remember our values and act accordingly?” My children must feel empathy and have the courage to stick up for themselves and others.
What values and behaviors do teachers want to see from children in their classrooms? Let’s take a moment to look at kindness, honesty, and respect and how these values can motivate your child to have better relationships with peers and teachers at school.
Kindness is smiling at someone or returning something they dropped. It is the act of doing something just because it makes your heart happy. You feel good about doing it without expecting anything in return. It also helps foster empathy so that your child begins to understand how others feel about things.
Honesty is another important value, because it helps teach the child to be truthful about things even if it leads to an undesired outcome. This helps improve their self-esteem and develop deeper connections with people in their lives. Honesty is a great way to teach your child about responsibility and how to be accountable for their actions.
It’s important to teach children to respect not only themselves but also others in their family and community—no matter their age, race, job, etc. Everyone deserves to be treated with the utmost respect and dignity.
Our children have many peer influences who may not agree with these values; however, by focusing on these three values, you will also be encouraging them to have the courage to make the right decision and treat someone appropriately despite what their friends may think.
Have open and honest conversations with your child around the dinner table about how their friends behave and how they would do things differently. This should be met with zero judgment. Give your child the opportunity to come up with their own solutions, using a lot of praise for good answers.
These values will help your child understand that you truly respect their teacher and agree with the rules in their classroom. Modeling this respect will encourage and motivate them to do better in school so you and their teacher will be proud of them. Be sure to praise them for having the courage to continue when things are difficult, as this will help them learn to persevere.
Dawn Tedrow, MSW, LCSW, C-DBT, is a Youth First Mental Health Professional at Cynthia Heights Elementary School in Vanderburgh County. Youth First, Inc., is a nonprofit dedicated to strengthening youth and families. Youth First provides over 100 highly trained mental health professionals (primarily master’s level social workers), prevention programs, parent engagement coordinators, and bilingual support personnel to 126 schools across 14 Indiana counties. Over 53,000 youth and families per year are served by Youth First’s school-based social work and community programs that promote mental health, prevent substance misuse, and maximize student success. To learn more about Youth First, visit youthfirstinc.org or call 812-421-8336.
